Proverbs 13:20 says, “He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will suffer harm.”

The great “prophet of old” Vanilla Ice put it like this, “Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.”

You won’t find your destiny until you find your people.

If you find your perspective to be negative all or most of the time, you may want to look for people that are positive and hang around them, learn from them, because you will become like those you surround yourself with.

My time studying martial arts showed me that while I could practice my forms in my living room and work hard alone, when I stepped into that studio with my like-minded Taekwondo family—where we had comradery—it would empower me in a distinct way.

They built me up, pulled more out of me, and pushed me higher, and I would do the same for them. I have found that others can often see more in you than you can see in yourself.

Simply put, life is meant to be lived in relational community. It’s what makes us better, even with all of the perceived messiness that can accompany it. Because, let’s face it, we are all a hot-mess in progress.

It’s this tension of doing life with others that actually causes us to rise above in life.

Your people are so important because they are tied to your purpose in life. It’s been said that your destiny is tied to your relationships.

From psychologists to theologians to pop stars of the 80’s and historians, they all agree that community and resilience are closely knit together

I heard one of my favorites, Jenn Johnson, talk about the way a particular redwood, called the cathedral tree, created community. It was approximately 800 to 1000 years ago that a huge tree stood in the middle of a formation. When it fell, it didn’t die.

The roots and burls of the stump sprouted, and nine trees happened to grow together in a circle around the original mother tree’s stump, which has long since rotted away.

That emphasizes the importance of having good people around you.

Psalm 133:1 (NIV) tells us, “How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!”

Here’s the simple key to remember: Relationships are worth the effort. That’s right; great relationships require effort.

But the result of being committed to a community (which by definition should be at least one more person than just you!) is a life that far exceeds anything you can ever dream.

I know. Relationships can be messy. But a life without good ones is from my experience, even messier.