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How to heal and not remain a victim

Emotional
/
Andrea Thompson

3 Steps to bring lasting healing

It’s not easy taking that first step to healing. It is very simple, but not easy at times.

There’s an over-arching principle I need you to understand as you read this: while you may not be responsible for the pain and trauma that has happened, you are responsible for something:

It’s your responsibility to decide whether you want to move forward and live a healthy, vibrant life.

Let me explain…

There is a vast difference between accountability, condemnation, and victimization.

Accountability says I see my part.
Condemnation says I can’t believe I did that. I’m such an idiot.
Victimization says I couldn’t help it.

The goal here is to learn to take accountability for yourself.

You are worthy of having control over yourself.

You are worthy of love.

And you are worthy of being taken care of, but this isn’t someone else’s responsibility, it is your own.

Living from this vantage point will enable you to see that healing and wholeness for the pain and problems of your past (or present) are things that you can overcome.

I’m just wanting to encourage you that while you can’t change your past, you can control the outcome of your future.

Some of you are sitting at the edge of your seats reading this saying “Andrea, just tell me the steps already!”. Some of you are thinking “3 simple steps won’t fix me and my pain.”.

You’re right…these three steps aren’t going to fix you over night, nor will they magically take all your pain and hurt away (but I promise that with the right and consistent approach, you really can heal).

What these things will do is push you in the right direction and give you a launching pad to finding healing and release from the pain of your past.

I always love to keep it as simple as possible, so here you go:

Step one: “RE-Lease”: This means it’s time to out loud forgive and release the person(s) that hurt you.
This can often be the hardest step to take. But letting the person go, releases the power they have over you. Keep releasing, over and over. This doesn’t mean you need to go invite the person over for dinner, it means that in your heart and mind, you aren’t going to allow the pain they caused you to pollute your soul.

An easy way to remember is this: “release until you find peace”

Step two: “RE-Identify”: Embrace the fact that God has a new identity for you.
You are a new creation in Christ, and this means that the old is gone, and the new has come. You are not defined by your past. You are a powerful person. When we know our true identity in Christ, we no longer live under shame or condemnation because it has been lifted off of us by His grace. Freedom, blessing, and abundant life are available to you now.

Step three: “RE-Enforce”: Continue to do what you did in step one and two
I told you I like to keep it simple. And really, the first two steps are the reason that I’ve been able to see my life turn around and change for the better.

Don’t give up too quickly. A farmer doesn’t put a seed in the ground, and see the entire crop ready to harvest by the end of the same day.

It takes time. But candidly, if we will continue in the right pattern, our healing will come (and stay) quicker than we might expect.

So, are you ready to take the journey towards healing from your pain and your past?

“Re-Lease”, “Re-Identify” and “Re-Enforce”

It’s worth it. You don’t have to be defined by what happened to you. Instead, you can now embrace the love and mercy of God, and watch Him turn your darkest day into an incredible display of light and love.

More to come on this subject soon…in the meanwhile, leave comments and let me know about your journey. I love to hear!

Andrea

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This Post Has 6 Comments

  1. Marc Smith 03/08/2018 Reply

    Andrea — Thank you for your encouragement. Re-lease, re-identify, re-enforce. Great words for TODAY. Your personal story has inspired me. I am grateful you have chosen to help. Acute Myeloid Leukemia and Multiple Myeloma are tough … but they are nothing compared to God’s power expressed through FAITH

    1. Hunter Paul 03/29/2018 Reply

      Amen! Nothing is impossible with God.

      God bless you, Marc on your journey!

      -Team Andrea

  2. Amanda Prigg 03/08/2018 Reply

    Thank you for sharing this, it has helped me so much in dealing with a very difficult relationship!

    1. Hunter Paul 03/29/2018 Reply

      Amanda,

      Thank you for responding! Many blessings to you!

      -Team Andrea

  3. Karen 03/08/2018 Reply

    This was good.
    It wasn’t until I could truly forgive my abuser that God stepped in & changed my situation. It took praying for 41 yrs & Praise God it changed. To me it was a huge answer to prayer. A MIRACLE! Never give up on God, never quit hoping. He is always there for you. Thank you for sharing! I’m not a victim I’m a Survivor!

  4. Patricia 05/02/2019 Reply

    Thanks for the wise words. I believe you are 100% correct. Forgiveness is sometimes the most difficult when you can’t distance yourself from the person who is offensive.

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